The COAL Concept

The COAL Concept

I wanted to share with you a concept that my Doctor told me about last year. It’s called COAL and I think it’s a really helpful way to look at things.

So, what is C O A L?

Well, it’s an acronym that stands for Curiousity Openness Acceptance Love. And it’s a concept you can apply to your life each and every day.

I did an little bit of research (thank you Google) and found that the acronym was invented by Dr. Daniel Siegel to describe the qualities of mindfulness.

I think it describes the relationship you can build with yourself and the world around you. It can help you grow and lead a happier more fulfilled life by being more present and mindful.

Let’s talk about each one separately and how they can support you in your everyday life.

CURIOUSITY

A great way to approach life is with a sense of curiousity. Ask questions, look at things from different angles, get interested in what’s happening. Look at things without judgment but rather curiosity. When we do this we bring a very different feeling to our days.

OPENNESS

Be open to opportunities, new concepts, opinions and different ways of looking at things. When we are more open it leads to more choice and variety in our lives.

ACCEPTANCE

To accept the things that you don’t have control over and can’t change. To accept where you are right now. This doesn’t mean you have to stay where you are, however acceptance of your current situation allows you to decide not only where to go next but how.

LOVE

To cultivate self love. To give love. To do things with love. To allow yourself to receive love. Being kind and compassionate to yourself and others. When we come to life with love we allow more joy into our lives.

Each of these things all feed into each other too.

Curiousity brings with it more openness, acceptance and the ability for love.

Openness feeds our curiousity and helps us accept and grow as well as allow more love in our lives.

Acceptance allows us to cultivate love and therefore be more open and curious.

Love for yourself and others certainly allows us more acceptance and leads to more openness and curiousity.

I think of the COAL Concept as a form of self care. If we have a solid self-care foundation we can cope much better when life throws us unexpected stresses.

Are there any situations or areas of your life where you can apply the COAL concept right now?
Will it help you be more mindful and present?

Let me know in the comments below, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Love and Peace, Dee xxx

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My Guiding Word for 2018

My Guiding Word for 2018

Last year was certainly a challenging year. Full of highs and lows, challenges, successes and lots and lots of healing.

HEALING was my word for 2017 and when I chose it I certainly didn’t think the year ahead would bring so much.

As I reflect on all that was 2017 I can see there is still a lot to integrate and I look forward to allowing this to happen.

Life happens for us, rather than to us, and it shapes who we are. But it’s good to remember that who we are today doesn’t have to be who we become. We have the power to make any change we desire.

And as I welcome 2018 with open arms I set the intention of COURAGE in my life.

This is my guiding word, my beacon of light as I move forward in my life and my business.

 

courage is not the absence of fear

but the ability to act in spite of fear

– Mark Twain

 

 

Courage

In 2018 I strive for…

The courage to invite strength, resilience and confidence to reside within me.
The courage to be me and not worry about what people think.
The courage to share what I’ve been through and am going through in order to help others.
The courage to speak out about what I believe in. To speak up. To be heard. To not always take the back seat.
The courage to listen more, reflect more, learn more, change and grow.
The courage to heal more deeply.
The courage to listen to my intuition each and every day.
The courage to really tune in to my body, nourish it with the food it needs and nurture it in the best possible ways.
The courage to allow the energy and enthusiasm that is just under the surface to come out and shine.
The courage to laugh more. To cry more. To feel more.
The courage to be me, fully and unapologetically.

 

I invite all this and more into my life for 2018 in order to support you on a deeper level. Because when we commit to ourselves first it allows us to give more. And to give in a free, open and generous way.

Do you have a guiding word for the year ahead? I’d love to hear what it is. Share with me in the comments below.

Love and Peace, Dee xxx

What If You Can?

What If You Can?

What If You Can

What if you can make that change?
What if you can do that thing?
What if you can become that person?

What would that mean for you?

The truth is you can.

It may take time.
It may take persistence.

You get to choose.

You can make the decision.
To do or not to do.
To take action.
One step at a time.

How would it feel to live the life you desire?
How would it feel to be doing the things you desire?
How would it feel to be fully you?

When you live as the person you desire to be you become that person and not only is that great for you but everyone around you benefits.

When you allow yourself to be fully YOU that is a gift to the world.

That inspires real connection.
That inspires others to do the same.
That inspires true joy and happiness.

I urge you to grab a piece of paper and pen and answer the questions above.

Do your answers awaken a desire to let the world see who you really are?

It’s scary I know! But you can make a plan and start taking steps today.

Make that change.
Do that thing.
Become that person.

It is possible.

In health and happiness, Dee xxx

PS if you’re feeling stuck and don’t know where to start then stay tuned for my new 3 month health and lifestyle program that will help bring you out of overwhelm and into a place of ease and fulfillment.

In the meantime get your free ebook below and you’ll receive my regular newsletter.

***image via The Moon Deck on Instagram

Self Care and Grief

Self Care and Grief

I’m not really sure where to start.

I’ve written about aromatherapy for grief in the past but I wanted to talk about deep self care when you’re in the midst of grief, about how important it is and how it’s helped me.

When I ran my first maa retreat a few weeks ago I made some silly mistake and someone remarked ‘it’s good to see that you’re human’ …another reason I wanted to write this – we all have stuff to wade through in life and sometimes it’s important to share it so you know you’re not alone. We’re all human!

My father passed away on 24th April and the sense of sadness has been immense.

I’ve been lucky enough to have the support of Andrew (my husband for those you who don’t know) and many friends.

There have been hard days and not so hard days, days that seem close to normal and days where I can’t hold it together at all. There’s been many nights with little sleep and lots and lots of tears.

But through it all I’ve made sure to look after me. I’ve taken some extra time off. I’ve stayed in bed all morning, I’ve reduced my workload, I’ve said no to things.

And I’ve massively upped my self care.

Massages. Acupuncture. Therapy sessions with my fabulous doctor. Aromatherapy. I even attended a beautiful Midwinter Goddess Gathering because it felt like a very healing thing to do.

The fact that ongoing self care is super important has been reinforced. When you’re consistently looking after yourself you can cope much better with the the hard things life throws at you. And it’s easier to increase your self care when it’s necessary if you already have it in place.

Massage has helped calm and ground me.

Acupuncture has brought me balance on a physical and emotional level.

Therapy sessions with my doctor has helped me keep my perspective and process not only the loss of my father but other things that have been happening around that.

Aromatherapy has supported me too. In my blog post Grief and 10 Essential Oils to Help I talked about Basil, Bergamot, Cypress, Lavender, Neroli, Roman Chamomile, Rose, Rosemary, Rosewood and Ylang Ylang.

There’s a few ESSENTIAL OIILS I’d like to add to that list…

Amber – Amber is grounding, soothing and calming in times of stress. It helps to alleviate depression and anxiety. It enhances relaxation, bringing inner balance and peace. It also calms the busy mind, helping with insomnia and allowing a deeper sleep.

Frankincense – Frankincense is soothing, calming and centering. It helps calm and slow down breathing. It enhances spirituality, inner wisdom, emotional healing and hope. It helps to reduce stress, anxiety and nervous exhaustion.

Mandarin – Mandarin gives emotional strength and support, peacefulness and serenity. It is helpful for insomnia and restlessness. It is sedating to the nervous system and uplifts the spirits, making it excellent for depression, sadness, nervous tension, anxiety, panic and stress. It is balancing, enhancing gentleness and bringing joy and happiness to the heart.

Patchouli – Patchouli balances and integrates the energy between mind, body and spirit. It is great for anxiety and depression. It is very grounding and deeply calming, creating a true sense of inner peace. It is also a very gentle oil great for wisdom, laughter and love

Sandalwood – Sandalwood is centring, grounding and harmonising. It heals the soul, promotes tranquillity and is great for meditation. Great for self-love. It also helps create openness and understanding, promotes love and hope and is excellent for loneliness and overcoming isolation. It gives a feeling of stability and togetherness, providing comfort and healing in times of stress, depression and confusion. It also helps insomnia sufferers and is perfect for anyone who has a lot going on in their life.

Three of my favourite blends have been…

Amber, Rose and Mandarin

Sandalwood, Roman Chamomile and Bergamot

Frankincense, Rose and Mandarin

I find inhalation the best method of use for grief
  • Just place a few drops on a tissue to inhale as you need to
  • add 10 – 15 drops to your oil burner to infuse the aroma throughout the room
  • place a drop on your pillow to help with sleep and rest.

 

This is just what has helped me over the last couple of months…it may be different for you. It’s hard. It’s exhausting. And it’s definitely an ongoing process.

Remember, whatever feels right for you is ok. And if you are going through the grieving process and feel you are not coping please seek professional advice, there is always someone who can help you through it.

You can also find some helpful info about grief here and coping with grief here on the GriefLink website.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Head to the comments below and let me know what’s helped you get through the grieving process.

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In health and happiness, Dee xxx

Create A Circle Of Support

Create A Circle Of Support

On my recent getaway to Cradle Mountain with Andrew – hubby and Mr maa for those of you who don’t him – I was struck by just how important it is to be surrounded by people who support and believe in you without question.

I’m not sure how silly this is going to sound, but here goes…

It was a beautiful day in Cradle Mountain, we were on holidays, breakfast and coffee were enjoyed and we ventured to Dove Lake for a hike. We were going to go to Marions Lookout but on a whim we decided to do Hansons Peak instead (we’d done Marions in the past).

It looked like quite a climb, but surely it wasn’t as steep as it looked! Turns out parts of it were quite steep with long drops over the side! And I got scared!!!

I had a mini anxiety attack at one point where the path was rocky and I couldn’t look to my right as I was afraid of falling off the edge…I just kept going, looking straight ahead and trying not to freak out!

Ok, made that bit! Phew!

And then a steep rock loomed above. There was a chain to hold onto and pull yourself up. I started up, following Andrew slowly. And then we came to a flat rock face with very few foot holes…and short legs weren’t helping!!!

I completely lost it – there was no way I was going to be able to get up up this bit! My whole body was shaking and my head was telling me this was as far as I was going – I couldn’t wait to be back down the bottom. I literally couldn’t move!

And this is when my one man support team stepped up to the plate, believing that I could do it and patiently waiting while my panic and anxiety dissipated. I believe that took about 15 minutes!

Needless to say I made it up that rock and to the top of Hansons Peak and boy was it worth it!

Check out the view…

There was a point when I truly didn’t think I could do it but I had someone by my side that believed I could – sometimes that’s what we need.

Actually we need to be surrounded by supportive people who believe in us all the time. This is what really hit me while sitting atop Hansons Peak taking photos of the stunningly beautiful view.

CREATE A CIRCLE OF SUPPORT

People who lift us up, cheer us on and celebrate us are essential to our wellbeing. We need to let people do this for us. As we do for them. We don’t have to do all the giving.

Accepting help from someone is one of the most beautiful gifts you can give them.

Take a look around you.
Do you have the support and love that you need?
If not what are some steps you can take to bring that into your life.
And how can you truly nurture those that you do have in your life?

I’d love to hear what you think…head to the comments below and let me know your thoughts.

In health and happiness, Dee xxx

Don’t Ditch Self Care When It Gets Too Busy

Don’t Ditch Self Care When It Gets Too Busy

WHOA!

The last couple of weeks have been exhausting to say the least. Yes, there are people out there having worse weeks for sure and that’s important to remember. But it’s also important to remember that if you feel like you’ve had a tiring week, then for you, you have! It’s time to acknowledge it and look after you.

Don't ditch self care

Rather than ditching self care, step up your self care to meet what’s going on in your life.

Often self care is the first thing to go when we’re busy, stressed and overwhelmed. It slips down the list because there are ‘too many things to do first’. But I’m here to tell you that this is the exact time that it’s super important to take time for you.

JUST. DO. IT.

MAKE. IT. HAPPEN.

Because if you don’t you’ll just spiral into more overwhelm, stress and tiredness, even anxiety and depression. And ultimately burnout. Which can lead to an array of health issues.

You’ve probably been there before…and it wasn’t worth it was it?

It takes practise but next time you catch yourself putting your self care second, stop and review the situation. Make some time for yourself before it’s too late.

Block out some time in your calendar for you. Stick to it just as you would if it was your best friend. Ask for help if you need it. Remember just how important it is for your wellbeing.

The washing, the ironing, the shopping, the cooking, all the things that ‘need to the done’ aren’t going anywhere…they can be put second but your self care simply can not.

The best time for self care is when there isn’t time.

If it seems there is no perfect time to stop, then that time is NOW!

Do you practise consistent self care? Head to the comments below and let me know.

In health and happiness, Dee.

PS As a health coach I can help you tailor a self care practise that works for you. Get my Free ebook below and you’ll be on the list to find out about my new program when it comes out.

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